Inevitably in life, we will face disapproval or rejection from others. This can come from anywhere in our lives such as a family member, friend or co-worker and depending our our level of self worth we can hear with our ears and quietly reject it or we can take it as a crushing criticism thereby letting it control us. We can grow up in a negative parasitic environment that takes everything away from us or come from a normal respectful house hold and still struggle with poor view point and low self worth. So it’s not primarily our surroundings but our interpretation of what is happening around us that we perceive to be against us. Point is that as soon as something is said or goes against what we think is right from our emotional bubble it’s taken as a huge knock and becomes this terrible burden of depression. These experiences can be quite painful, because we all want to be liked and accepted. We all want to be supported and nurtured and loved by those around us. Being rejected or ridiculed by others (especially if it’s a frequent occurrence) can cause us to question our own self-worth and value as a person.

It seems that we always want to validate ourselves somehow by our external situation and yet all those negative feeling come from inside our mind. If we constantly look for others to say it’s ok and try to live on those complements then we are always seeking them but what if we learned to complement ourselves. No better medicine like a little self appreciation to make the world go around but in order to find value in ourselves we must first recognize it in others. By seeing great value in others by what they do or how they act will then soften the focus on our perceived situation. When you continue to find good in others you will find it in yourself.

When the thoughts you are thinking are negative in form then we tend to find more thoughts to match them and then situations to goes with those view points and downward from there. How many people go to doctors for medication because they cannot control their thoughts which are a continuing and maddening quagmire of garbage we see as ourselves. If we stay in this funk for a long time and some people become very good at it because they can stretch it out for decades and really begin to enjoy it as wall. Strikes me like you enjoy pain, not my cup of tea.

See to counter this you can be told to think positive thoughts.

Great – just what is a positive thought anyway.

I think that can be another article but not this one.

Since we are very habit forming creatures then the best solution for the short term is to do thing a little different each day, like sitting in another chair at home or on the couch. One things that is vital and we have moved away from it is reading and you may hate reading as I well know because someone close to me says the same thing. I will say with out a doubt that there is magic in the written word because it can transform our view point on so many things. Another simple technique is to go for a walk if your able and to look at things far away, this not only changes your environment but help you focus on other things. I can’t tell you the chemical changes it makes in your brain but it will help you feel better so just continue to do more of it.

Filed under: Negative Self Esteem

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